How Women Lock Down Men (Stage 4): Behavior Modifcation

Come on ladies, we can FIX them!

By Africanlegend
Up until this point, the man is under the impression that he is fine exactly the way he is. That he is loved for who he is but he is soon to find that he is actually loved for who he CAN be with a few "minor" changes over time. What a girl actually does is credit you for attributes you don't have yet but ones that she believes she can inspire you to have in the near future. You don't have to be rich, you have to have all the ingredients that if mixed correctly and baked at the right temperature will mean you will become rich ~ you get the point? Essentially, every woman is a professional Real Estate Flipper when it comes to guys.

A woman wants a guy that she can show off to her friends and boast that he was a total piece of trash who used to urinate in the streets and beat women during his smoking break but after they fell in love, he saw the light, converted to Buddhism, quit his finance job and opened an animal sanctuary.

After the honeymoon period or the grace period where the man will be allowed to continue to be himself,  there will be a drastic shift in domestic policy from the woman as the exterior and interior designing begins. This will be marked by a sudden and seemingly out of the blue assault of complaints about things he thought she enjoyed or at least didn't mind......
I don't wanna go out every week....
How come you have so many female friends....
Why do girls keep leaving you messages on facebook....
I called you and sent you a text, why didn't you call me back.....
How come we never do that.....
How can you wear that in public....
You drink too much.....
You need to work out more.....
You spent too much time with your friends.....
How come we never do things that I wanna do.....
How come you are never jealous.....
You play too much video games......
I don't like your friend Jake, he is all about the b@tches....

While the guy will resist change and continue to do the things he has always done, it will become more difficult for him. The woman may not necessarily tell him he should stop so much as mention that she feels it's a problem and make it seem as if he has the choice to continue or stop. However, the problem is that if he continues to do those things, she will make damn sure his life becomes a living hell with passive aggression being the weapon of choice. Silent treatment therapy, general lack of co-operation, sex withholding are all methods that will be used until the guys behavior slowly begins to change because:

A) Most guys genuinely don't want their girlfriends to be unhappy.
B) It is not worth the repercussions or penalty for continuing the course of action in question i.e why go to happy hour for 1.5 hours so you can deal with 3 days of passive aggressive behavior.

So the guy slowly begins to change and not necessarily because he wants to but, because it's easier that way. She is flipping him and designing him into the man she thinks he should be. The only problem with this is that the man may just be a product of her overly optimistic imagination and may not even exist at all or the guy will behave like she wants but walk around like an undead, soulless version of himself (see: Dawn of the dead). Then he will soon be accused of not having any passion for her when it was effectively extinguished along with all the fun things he is now barred from engaging in.


Coming soon: Stage 5: The Walking Dead

Category: Funny, Lists, Relationships