Stupid People that need to go: The "Google Me" guy

Seriously just Google me, you'll find out

You've just had a long day at the office. You can’t wait to unwind over a couple of drinks with your BFF. You get to the bar, sit down together and order a couple of cosmo’s. She starts telling you the funniest story she read on Fmylife about this girl who went to watch Harry Potter without reading the book first and how it ruined her life permanently. A couple of guys come over and ask if they can join you. They look harmless enough, so you say yes. It is not long before they decide to be "Alpha Males" and totally dominate your conversation by asking you questions and then answering them on your behalf. One of them starts rambling on about how he earned his first million when he was 16 with a successful dot com business. He continues by gloating about how he worked as a UNICEF volunteer in Sierra Leone helping civil war victims, taking only the occasional vacation to Rwanda to help rebuild the homes of genocide victims. Your eyes glaze over as you plan your escape. Suddenly he whips out his iphone, thrusts it in your face and says “You don't believe me? Google me”

Why this person has got to go. Are you kidding me? You don’t need to thrust your iPhone in my face just because you think I don’t believe you saved an entire village from four vicious lions with a can opener, wearing nothing but a loin cloth. I don’t, but that's beside the point. Now I am forced to act impressed while thinking you are a total narcissistic, egomaniacle jerk. BTW it's not ok if your wing man does it either.

How to deal with this person. There is no way to deal with this guy fairly he is obviously insecure. If you tell him he is a jerk, he will likely break down and cry, then you will look like the jerk. You have to make him feel uncomfortable enough to the point where he has no choice but to leave. If you are in public, proceed to tell everyone you can that he is famous. He may be flattered at first, but by the time the 11th waiter has smiled politely then rolled their eyes he will begin to feel excruciatingly uncomfortable. When you manage to force the people next to you to move just to avoid hearing his life story, he will be forced to get up an leave. Mission accomplished!

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