8 Signs your Best Friend is a C-Blocker.
You may be spending the premium years of your life in the company of a c-blocker and you don't even realize it. Conventional wisdom suggests that the c-blocker will be an outside force but beware of a wolf in sheep's clothing. Your best friend may be a Trojan Horse strategically implanted in your night, waiting to strike. When everything looks like it's going well, the troops will be unleashed and you will be robbed and pillaged of all your happiness and hope. Here are some signs you can look out for to help you ascertain whether or not your friend might be a covert c-blocker.
1. Your female friend calls herself a "wingwoman."
You have an attractive, single, female friend. She is always talking about how great you are always trying to set you up with her friends, she calls herself your "wingwoman." The only problem is all the friends she introduced you to are unavailable as a result of many factors, ranging from marriage to unacceptable looks. She never introduces you to available women that are more attractive than her and all her single friends that are attractive have some fundamental character flaw that makes them, "not good enough for you" ~ or so she says. The truth is, you are being c-blocked. The plan is not to have you find someone else, she values your attention too much to just give away. Single women do not generally hand off quality men to their friends or to women they don't know (i.e Skanks). Hanging out platonically with women is very advantageous for many reasons but there is no such thing as a "wingwoman."
2. Your friend is not willing to play wingman.
Last week you had to talk to a women that looked like Big Foot so that your friend had a chance to talk to a girl he was into. Now it is time for him to sacrifice himself and do his duty. You want to talk badly to this really cute girl but she is under heavy guard by The Lochness Monster. You ask for backup and your buddy refuses, you even offer to buy him a 6 pack but he gives you an unequivocal no. You end up having to go in alone. You get there and you don't even get a word in before her friend, the Lochness Monster, jumps in front of you, tells you that she is not interested and bites you on the arm, forcing you to leave the bar and take rabies and tetanus shots just to be safe. You have been c-blocked, your buddy's selfishness has cost you dearly.
3. If your friend doesn't get hit on, she always wants to leave!
This addresses the basic purpose of a wingman. If you are talking to a woman and there is a surplus of women, the remaining women will c-block the principal, should they evaluate that they have nothing to gain from the interaction. You need a wingman to keep the extra woman occupied by throwing attention at them thereby deactivating their c-block mode. So beware of the friend that always falls sick, needs to go to the bathroom or wants to go to another bar conveniently when a handsome guy approaches you. It's merely subterfuge designed to guarantee your failure.
This is when a friend, who more often than not has a significant other, informs you on a given night that they will be drinking excessively and that you need to protect them and keep them away from the opposite sex. What they are telling you is that their actions tonight will c-block your endeavors so it's best you know in advance so you don't plan anything elaborate. This is very selfish. Everyone is out to have fun, why not foster and environment where everyone can have fun, not just you. If you have someone and are happy let your friends have to opportunity to find someone. Protect yourself from men, all grown women can do it, they have been rejecting men since they were 8. If it gets a bit rough, then your friends should step in, that's what friends are for.
5. They are always making reference to how many members of the opposite sex you get attention from compared to them.
These references refer to an insecurity your friend has with regards to you social prowess compared to theirs. The insecurity will often manifest itself in institutionalized c-blocking. Such feelings towards you may turn into a deeply embedded resentment on occasion especially where alcohol is involved. The night they feel worst about themselves they will become very upset and that may lead to destroying your night, proceeding to leave and forcing you to come back home with them. That way nobody gets any attention from anybody.
7. They are widely regarded as unattractive, uncharismatic or otherwise scary looking.
If your best friend is grenade it may cause complications when you go out. Wingman will refuse to hit on them or girls will not be willing to talk to them. This is not to say you shouldn't have unattractive friends but to warn you that inherent to their existence is a natural factor of c-blockage. Accept it. It's more important to have good friends than it is to have attractive friends but don't be surprised if when hanging out with the unattractive ones you get considerably less attention from the opposite sex. If your friend is genuinely scary e.g a huge black dude, who will likely scare the average white girl, it is best to be smart about where you hang out with them. Try hanging out with them during the day on in well lit places to minimize the fear factor they inspire in others. This way they won't drive people away.
8. You have a Lesbian Friendship/Bromance with your friend.
If boys would rather hang out with each other than females then it is considered "gay" or "super gay" and for that reason a bromance resulting in c-blockage is rare. Women on the other hand have license to make out with other women and treat each other like surrogate boyfriends with little social repercussion. A bond of friendship at this level requires time and attention. In many situations anything that puts this bond in jeopardy will cause the opposite party to c-block to preserve it. Guys may say something to the intruding woman to upset her so she loses all interest in his friend. ladies might whisk their friend away and start making out with them which while impressive to some guys, seldom comes with an invitation for them. This is just cock blocking in another shape and form.
Category: Funny, Relationships
