Educating the West part 1: The Geography of Africa.
"The Diversity and size of the Motherland"
By Sparklinglegend.
Preface
Misconceptions about Africa have spread through the west like a religious plague. Africans, like us, who came to the west excited about the opportunities of a wealthy, educated 1st world, had our illusions stripped by the first "You're from Africa...." barrage of questions 2.3 seconds after landing.. Fellow Africans all over the west will no doubt relate to these painful experiences. "My fellow Africans, these sort of questions will never end without a unified effort. Join stuff-about.com by spreading every article we write to every western friend you know and be part of the movement to enlighten the west and more importantly to save yourself the trouble of answering the same questions EVERY single day."
Sadly, the following questions are real and have not been altered in any way for humor purposes or dramatic effect.
Identities has been omitted to protect the ignorant.
Educating the West: Part 1 - Geography 101
Q:“You're from Africa? My wife and I have been to that COUNTRY...”
Africa is NOT country. If you believe it is you are actually ignorant beyond redemption and you should stop reading and just shoot yourself in the face.
Africa is a continent with 52 countries and cultures and languages too numerous to mention.
Africans do not all get along. Many countries have conflicts with one another. The only thing we all agree on is that we should disown Nigeria.
Q: “You're from Zambia? Do you know this guy Umpalumpa? He is from Sudan.”
I have a roughly 1 in 600 million chance of knowing the aforementioned Umpalumpa, so kindly stop asking this type of question.
Tim Kring who wrote Heroes-The Butterfly Effect is an educated Westerner:
Usutu: "You come from America."
Matt Parkman: "Yes, how did you—?"
Usutu: "Do you know Britney Spears?"
Matt Parkman: "...No."
Usutu: "She is from America."
Matt Parkman: "Yeah. America's a big place."
Usutu: "Yes. Africa is too."
Think about it.....
Q: “Hey Jumbo!. Hakuna Matata!”
"Hey I am just saying it could have been a bit more educational."
Since the "Lion King", westerners abandoned doing any research about Africa and regarded the movie as 1h 29 min summary of Africa. Timone, Pumba and Simba exacerbated the situation by singing "Hakuna Matata" in the movie causing non-African people to assume that Swahili is the universal language spoken by all Africans. Truth is, if you are not from Kenya or Tanzania you also heard it first in the Lion King.
COMING SOON: "Clothes in Africa?"
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