F@ck Marry or Kill: The solution for employee morale?
 |
| Every restaurant has it's own stories.... |
It doesn't take long to realize there are certain facts that are true of every restaurant in which the main entrées cost less than $20.
1. 75% of the employees smoke cigarettes.
2. A handful of the employees have drugs in their vehicles.
3. At least one employee will have drugs on their person.
4. Someone will ask you for a ride home, whether you've worked there for 6 months or 6 hours.
5. One of the managers is screwing one of the servers,
6. The female bartender always has a tattoo.
7. There is always a bar less than a mile down the street at which 80% of your co-workers will get shit-faced after every shift.
.......And every restaurant has a game the employees play to cope with their suffering.
When I started working at Mimi's it was a new restaurant, and a game had not yet been established. I suggested F.M.K., or F@ck, Marry, Kill. So, for instance, I would say "Brad Pitt, Paul Walker, and Prince Harry" and the other person would have to assign one of these men to each category. It first it was just something to pass the time, but things escalated quickly. The game was spreading like wildfire, and the best part was creating F.M.K.'s that featured fellow co-workers in the worst possible combinations we could think of. It was just the servers at first, but then the bartenders wanted in, and before long, the assistant managers were in on the action, too.
Once, the general manager held a meeting in which my little game was explicitly discussed. It had become controversial since we were including the names of other employees and some people had grown a bit upset, being objectified and all. But, after much deliberation, the GM ruled that the game was great for employee morale and that it was more beneficial than harmful. That's right- a game where you demean the integrity of every single person with whom you work- was decidedly a great thing. So if the morale are your work place is suffering, suggest F.M.K to your supervisor today....
Adapted from: Restaurants: The Way, the Truth and the Light
Category: Funny
