6 Surefire Ways to get Any Man to Listen to You!
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| Get through that blissful wall of ignorance his has worked for years to develop.... |
After my article “Female Survival Guide”: What He Really Means,” I received a lot of feedback from women saying, “We don’t care what HE means. How do we get HIM to listen to US?” After doing a bit of research, I realized there are many articles out there suggesting half hearted ways that women can try to get men to listen. My conclusion: they don’t work. If you really want men to listen, you have to be firm. We put all of Stuff-about.com’s resources into finding the answer and here it is ladies. 6 fool proof ways to get HIM to listen to YOU.
1.Stick to topics he is interested in.
Men’s brains have a much smaller memory capacity than women’s. This leads to a much smaller area of interest. While women have many varied interests that constantly change over time, the majority of men on hitting puberty develop a limited number of set interests which are universal. Men find it difficult to focus on anything outside of these interests, so it is a good idea to stick to subjects he can focus on. These include and are pretty much limited to beer, food, sex, sport and themselves.
2. Tie him down so he can’t escape
Experts suggest that if you want to have a serious conversation with a guy you may need to restrain him. It is best you execute this while you are sitting side by side so he is ill-prepared to react. Most men tend feel threatened in any situation involving women and conversation for fear that they may be trapped indefinitely in crossfire of words. So if they see you coming they will automatically try to escape. To ensure he can’t escape while you are talking to him, incapacitate him in some way. You can do this by tying him down or cuffing him (he will probably let you do this if you ask him) or setting his feet in a tub of quick drying cement while he is sleeping.
3. Do NOT interrupt a sporting event.
Women often make the mistake of trying to hold a conversation with a guy while they are watching sports, this is a big mistake. Men and dogs have an inexplicable fascination with spherical objects; if they see a ball, their attention is immediately diverted. If you really wish to hold a conversation during a sporting event, you have to employ drastic measures such as breaking the TV, disabling the internet connection and phone lines and trapping him in the house by barricading all doors and windows. It is important that he does not suspect you have anything to do with any of these events. The alternative is to invite him to watch you having lesbian sex, which studies show is one of the few things that divert a male's attention from sport, if only for an instant.
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| Effective but highly impractical..... |
Men have a very short attention span. This is because their brains are made up of a lot of empty spaces. Long words or sentences often get lost or mixed up in the large vacuum. This means they have to try and fit the pieces together to understand what you are saying. They then completely miss the true meaning for what you are saying. This leads to communication errors and painful misunderstandings. To combat this, speak in short sentences and try to stick to words of 1 to 2 or syllables or less.
5. Show cleavage.
A recent scientific study from the University of Wellington, New Zealand has proved that men like looking at breasts “because they are aesthetically pleasing whatever size they are.” To make sure you have his attention, make sure your breasts are featured predominately or expose a little cleavage. Cleavage is especially useful as you can use it to adjust the intensity of his focus by leaning forward or back as desired. Please note however, that this will not be at all effective if there are any spherical objects in the vicinity.
6. Change the tone your voice.
“According to a study recently published in the world renowned journal NeuroImaging, the male brain interprets men's voices as speech and women's voices as music.” This is why men can hold absolutely meaningless conversations with other men and stay involved and focused but the minute a woman speaks, their brains clock out. To avoid this problem, we suggest you alter your voice when you wish to communicate. If you speak in a deep gruff voice, he will immediately snap out of the dreamy state caused by the melodious sound of your natural voice. You could seek help to do this comfortably from a professional. A speech coach will give you exercises which will help you lower the pitch of your voice. Alternatively you can buy a digital speech distorter like the one they use for Darth Vader in the Star Wars Trilogy.
